They say it takes a village to raise a child; I found my village in the form of 46 strangers in an online due date group.
A due date group — or a DDG for the acronym-loving mom community online — is a group chat of women who are pregnant whose due dates are in the same month. Sometimes the group forms in large Facebook communities with thousands of members, or in private subreddits where you're required to upload a dated ultrasound as proof of pregnancy to gain entry.
The due date group I joined shortly after receiving a positive pregnancy test in September 2022 originated in a Facebook group, then moved to an app called BFF.
At one point, there were more than 60 women in our group chat, but by the time we gave birth, it was me and 46 others, and we officially "closed" the group to maintain connection and privacy.
Nearly four years later, we still chat every single day — and many of us have met IRL, too.
I found a mom community of 46 strangers from around the country
After navigating the fertility side of social media while trying to conceive (TTC, if we're continuing with the acronyms), finally joining a due date group felt like a rite of passage.
I watched as women in the TTC Facebook group I participated in graduated to mom Facebook groups. They'd rave about their due date group chats, often announcing the babies' births with a photo of their newborns wearing the same cute outfit or sharing details of a group trip they'd taken together.
"Find your due date group!" their posts urged. I yearned for that sort of connection.
I joined — and quickly became enamored with — my group of June 2023 moms. My phone buzzed all day as we got to know one another on BFF, where we've organized the chat into nearly 50 rooms spanning different topics of parenthood and personal interests.
The group became a lifeline during pregnancy and postpartum
Since the throes of the first trimester, we've been through it all together — gender reveals, baby showers, giving birth, sleepless nights, birthday party planning, cancer diagnoses, relationship ups and downs, losses, subsequent pregnancies, and more.
The group especially shone in June 2023, when most of us gave birth, and during our early postpartum days. We were all on high alert for announcements of water breaking or planned induction or C-section dates.
Nearly every day, we celebrated a baby being born; sometimes two or three in a single day.
Once the babies arrived, no matter the time of day (or more realistically, in the middle of the night), someone was online to lend an ear. It was nice to never feel alone, especially while feeding and rocking a baby in a dark room.
It wasn't all serious, though; on Friday nights, the chat lit up with what we called "Friday night polls," one-upping each other with wilder and wilder questions, learning hilarious tidbits about each other, our marriages, and our families, along the way.
A book club formed. We hosted holiday gift exchanges on Zoom. A Fantasy Football league provided friendly competition during the NFL season.
In the summer of 2024, just after our babies turned one, 14 of us met in person for a kid-free weekend in North Carolina. We spent a glorious few days at a beautiful house on Lake Norman, sitting in the sunshine with a glass of wine, excited to simply be together.
These friendships are real — and lasting
These women are no longer strangers. Over the years, we've become more than casual acquaintances who met online; our bond runs deep.
I can tell you the names of the babies in the group, along with their siblings. I know who is a stay-at-home mom and who is a working mom. I know who is planning a trip to Disney World next month. I know who wants to have more kids and whose families are complete.
As our babies have grown — the June 2023 babies are now turning three! — the chat has evolved from trading feeding tips and venting about sleep deprivation to navigating toddler tantrums and potty training.
While the chat isn't as active as in the early days, and some members have naturally dropped off, we're still extremely close — and many of us talk daily.
We've gone on to support one another through second (and even third!) pregnancies. These women were there for me during the most chaotic, messy, and beautiful time of my life — and I count some of them as real-life best friends these days.
I welcomed my second baby in January, and yep — I joined another due date group.
The village continues to grow.
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Jessica Lawlor is a writer and editor with more than 15 years of experience. She runs Jessica Lawlor & Company, where she works with content marketing clients. She also writes Mom Story Time, a Substack highlighting moms building cool businesses and pursuing creative endeavors alongside parenting. She’s a mom of two. Connect with her on LinkedIn.
